I am Ellie, notorious hermit.
Growing up, I’ve had people think I couldn’t talk. I was scared of unexpected visitors and of saying “hello”. I went to uni, became even more depressed than usual, then deferred and got my first “real” job. Despite being strikingly socially awkward, working felt good. I moved around jobs looking for better oppotunities, and two things happened:
- I got more interviews and better job offers than friends and colleagues with more experience, and
- I still didn’t feel like I fit in – socially, or professionally.
What was happening here? People were telling me that I had everything, why did I still feel lost?
So I made a radical decision – I left everyone who was telling me “you’ve got your life sorted”. I left my “sorted” life and rebooted myself in the UK as a university student again.
It was great! With nobody to tell me that I should be happy, I made happiness of my own. I acted goofy. I spoke up. I was true to myself in ways I’d never done before. I felt the difference between being shy and being introverted; I was now only the latter. I returned home, with new confidence, a new degree and the hottest guys in my class who turned out to be the love of my life!
I had learned who I truly was and want was important to me. I’d learned how to set goals and achieve them. I threw myself back into the job hunt at a time when my main field was being gutted (resulting 100s of applications for each vacancy), and I still managed to get an excellent job.
Why wasn’t it enough?
I was still missing the energy that came from following my dreams my way. So I freed myself from comparing my dreams to others and found true happiness!
Not bad for someone who was told that she would never amount to anything and would only be “a hermit”. Would never leave the house. Would never have a job. Too shy and anxious she wouldn’t even answer the phone until she was 15 (I kid you not, this is true).
I now have a Master’s degree, a powerful addiction to my loving husband, a curiosity about everything in the world, and a chronic need to write and to help others in any way I can. My journey to understand more of myself also lead me to Slimpod – technically it’s a weightloss programme, but in reality has helped thousands of people reach their goals sooner and find new levels of mental freedom. Including me.
Most importantly, I also find a way to feel at home, everywhere. Just like a hermit.
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